Genuine Idiocy

There's something lurking outside my flat door. Something deadly, addictive and pricey. I'm so engrossed by it everyday. If I don't see it in any day, it will be a very strange day. It parts you and your moolah in exchange for one of its content.

Get the idea? It's the vending machine outside my room door. Everytime I’m studying, people will drop by and use it. The kling-kling-dit-dit-dit-ka-bong-bong-boongg! sound is just so mesmerising. As fast as lightning, I hunt down my coin pouch for some coins to slot in the machine and get myself a can of Coke. At the height of my career, I spent $3.60 for two cans of Coke per day.

However, the machine failed me on Thursday. I was humming to myself when I came back from lecture theatre after my Environment Biology (looks easy, but I’ll know the result on Tuesday) test and saw beams of white light radiated by it. The next thing you know I was hunting down my coins again.

I needed a $1 coin for washing machine (yes I do wash my clothes…) so I pocketed $2.80 and went out. First I slotted 10 cents and it wouldn’t bulge, so I took my $2 coin and slotted that in as well. The two coins were stuck in the middle of the slot, but I can’t reach it. I took another 10 cents and tried to make the coins go in. One by one, I put the rest of my coins into the slot. When I’m left with only 2 10 cents, I pressed the Cola button instead. “SOLD OUT”

Geez, no Coke after all… I frowned and pressed the coins return button. My coins didn’t go ka-blung! this time… Oh no! I lost my coins! $2.60! RM 6.50! Zzzz….

I blamed myself for my stupidity. There are three ominous telltale sign aforementioned to this incident:

1. My flatmate went to get Coke from it on Wednesday night and complained that he had to run to three different vending machines in three different locations before getting his err… squished, flattened and ruptured Orange Soda can.

2. Two hours before the incident, before the test, my friend Kristel told me about her adventure with the vending machine. “The machine outside your flat ate my money!” She exclaimed. And I thought she was just too nerve wreck for the test.

3. 9 hours before the incident, I was studying at night when one guy and a girl came to the machine. Soon they started to bang the machine and shouted “Give me back my money! Damn it! $@#%&” Zzz… Don't they ever realise that machines have no IQ? They don’t go like, “Oh sorry! Looks like Coke in my tummy is fresh out. Have some lemonade instead!”

How I wish I didn’t say that, for the next day same thing happened to me. Haiz… Oh well… And what’s the worst thing? After the incident, when I’m studying at night, two people drop by again and got something else. And they said, “Hey look! There’s more than $2 dollar change… Wow!” That’s my money, moron! But I didn’t go and demand my coins back. It would be very odd… So I just let it be. Lucky people. How I wish I get back my $2.60 next time.... Haiz….